Today was the day for the 2nd treatment. Arrived around 10:30. Had a pre-treatment visit with Doc. He seems pleased with how I'm doing. He had a 4th year intern visit with me first. She said to me she wasn't anywhere near as experienced as Doc, but she was working on getting more proficient at working through the exam process. All I could think was, at the rate people are getting cancer, she'll be a pro in no time. Kind of sad, but good for her that she chose oncology as her profession. She seemed to have a gentle "bedside manner", and lord knows those of us who are in crisis with our diagnosis can use that kind of nature as opposed to the cold and indifferent demeanor that some have.
The treatment itself isn't so bad. I didn't really start to feel the affects of the first treatment until after the day I had the Neulasta shot, which boosts the white blood cells. Then I took a spin on a roller coaster. I'm hopeful I learned some good lessons on how to manage each day, but one thing is for sure, there's never two days alike. I can never seem to predict how my energy will be or whether I'm going to have a day of nausea. Doc told me today that he believes each treatment will get easier to handle. The first time I did this, I just remember getting more and more sluggish with each treatment, so I hope he's right. They are different drugs he is using, so I'm choosing to be optimistic about it.
And, on a sad note, I had to shave my head over the past weekend. I'm not sure there are many things more disheartening that seeing your hair piled up in the sink and not on your head. I tried so hard to hang onto it. It was two weeks and two days since my first treatment. That didn't take very long. But I was starting to feel like Charlie Brown's Christmas tree. There was hair everywhere! You would think it would be something you can control and just comb it out periodically, but that's not how it works. There's no pattern to how it falls out. It just start dropping as you walk. So, I broke out the shears and away it went. I didn't cry, but I was close. The next six months seem like forever away. I just have to hang on and keep plugging away each day to make it as productive as possible.
I still haven't settled on a wig. I've been wearing one that everyone seems to think is fairly attractive. It's so much more comfortable than the one I bought the first time around. But I have another one that is more like the style I typically wear my hair. I just can't get it styled right. It's seems too long in front, and I would take it to the salon and have it trimmed, but it was fairly expensive. Since they don't grow back, I'm hesitant to mess with it. I might just take it back.
One of my clients invited me to a Oneness Blessing. It's kind of a meditation/healing ceremony. I took mom -- she's never been to anything like that, and she's had some health issues of late, so I thought, "why not?" And away we went. It was interesting. I definitely felt some strong energy from the two gals who conducted the session. I guess I figured it couldn't do any harm. It felt good to sit and meditate, at any rate. I rarely get to spend quality time doing those kinds of things, since I'm either running from one task to another, or with these treatments, I'm physically flat-lined and can't even think about sitting in the focus of a meditation.
Doc asked me if I was getting any exercise. He must have someone who shovels his snow. I'm convinced. I just laughed. But I do feel good that I kept moving. We'll see what happens with this round!
No comments:
Post a Comment